Can You Fix Me?

 Um,  if you were an animal and I was a vet, yes I could. But you are not an animal and I am not a vet. So sorry, no I cannot fix you. 

OK, all jokes aside. People do ask me that. And they get very disappointed at my answer. I have my reasons:

1. I can't pull miracles out of my ... I just can't!

2. I don't know how you want to be fixed, and what I may think is you fixed, may actually be you broken. 

3. Is not my job to fix you. 

4. Um, nope, sorry, I can't think of a 4th one. 

OK, so lets look at these points a little closer. 

1. I can't pull miracles out of my ... ! Well, it's true. I don't have a magic wand, I'm not your fairy godmother, and miracles are not my specialty. I never went to uni to learn how to make miracles happen. I never found any class that taught that. 

2. I don't know how you want to be fixed... it's true. You know you best. I can point you in the right direction, I can offer you tools to make changes to yourself, I can offer insights, but ultimately, it's you who knows you best. 

3. It's not my job. Well, it's not. Fixing you is actually your job. I just kinda help and support you along the way. I know, I've done how many years at university? And at the end of that I tell you that fixing you is not my job? What kind of therapist am I? I'd like to think I'm the honest kind. 

If you know right at the get go that is your job to fix you, then this makes your job easier for you. You know straight up what the expectations are. You know that you have to do the hard yards, whatever homework is set for you and whatever experiments you want to run on yourself. 

The therapy I offer is client focused with the drive towards action on your part. That action is you doing what you need to do to fix you. So if you need to learn how to set and enforce boundaries, then you are expected by me to actually do that. I can show you how, I can offer suggestions, but ultimately it's up to you. 

So no, in answer to the question at hand, I cannot and will not fix you. That's your job.